Molly posted this on our teenage pregnancy page
I'm 16 and lately I've been feeling that I want a baby - I wouldn't PLAN one (like, put holes in a condom or anything) but I want one - does that make sense? Its a really weird feeling - my boyfriend and I were talking about what would happen if I ever was pregnant and he said he'd support me in whatever decision i make. I don't know why I have this feeling. I'm just wondering why it would be happening to me? its kind of like a craving... it's weird. I'd like to know why I'm feeling like this? If I can thanks xo
Can you offer Molly any ideas of why she might be feeling like this?
i feel the same way, i am 16 and want a baby. i feel like i could do it but my boyfriend is worried that he wont be able to be the dad he wants to be because we still go to school. but i really want a baby
I see that you both may want a baby and there are times when you are just going through a faze that you will grow out of later. You have to realize that another life will be depending on you and there are some reasons why you are feeling this way.
You both could be feeling this way because you and your boyfriend are wanting to start a new life, because you are in love. Another reason may be that there is something going on at home that you may want to talk to your parents about as well as friends. Sometimes friends tend to be in the center especially if they have kids. Yes they are a bundle of joy, but if you are still in school then you may want to make sure that you waive your options.
I would suggest making a list of pro and cons of having a baby while you are still in school. You are young and you want to graduate, but if you end up with something so precious it may take you some time. Have you and your boyfriend made a list together or talked about what you both will do when the baby arrives? You have to be able to take care of yourselves and the new life. You both my be feeling this because you are big sisters or you are wanting a baby now with the guy that you love. Please think about it and try to finish all of your studies first. Good Luck to you both and I hope I helped a little.
I think it is common for younger girls to have feelings like this. During the teenage years, your hormones are still adjusting and you may be having various emotions regarding relationships. The teenage years are quite difficult, as you are no longer a young child, but you are also not an adult.
Some teenagers may feel that they are in love, and they desperately want to start a family. A girl may think that having a baby will give her a chance to have something of her own that she is responsible for, and it may make her feel more like an adult. She may also feel that having a baby will fill a void in her life, and she will be able to receive and give unconditional love.
The problem is that, even though a girl at that age feels mature enough, there is nothing that can truly prepare someone for becoming a parent. A baby is a blessing and brings great joy into the lives of everyone in the family, yet a baby is still a huge responsibility.
I know it is easy to think that you are mature enough or capable enough, but having a baby really does change your life. You become responsible for another person who depends on you for everything. The baby will need fed and changed, but he or she will also need love, care and attention all day (and night) long. This leaves little time for school, work or studying. There is also the price of raising a baby, as you will need suitable housing, nappies, money for extra medical expenses, and money for other baby-related items.
I truly believe that babies bring great joy and love to a family, but the joy and love come with a great responsibility. The best thing is to focus on school and find a good job. You should also get to know your boyfriend better, as things could change if the two if you were living together alone. I know it may seem like you will be waiting forever to start a family, but waiting is truly better. It gives you a chance to spend more time with your boyfriend and develop a strong relationship, so you both feel committed enough to get married. It also gives you time to discover who you are and what you want out of life, such as choosing a career. I wish you both the best.
I remember feeling like this at fifteen and sixteen. I agree with what other posters have said about it being a hormonally-charged phase that we all go through. After all, this is the age when our sexuality begins to bud and underneath it all the purpose of sex is procreation. So, naturally some of these feelings will bubble to the surface.
Though I believe babies are a blessing, they are a huge responsibility. Although these feelings are a normal part of development for most girls, it is really important that you wait. I had my first baby at twenty-one, though it was the very best thing that could have ever happened to me, I was completely blindsided by the responsibilities that come with parenthood.
I would suggest that you take on babysitting jobs or spend time with younger relatives to fill that yearning for a baby. When you are older and in a more stable place, you will have had years of practice to prepare you for the joy of motherhood as a mature young adult, without the stresses of being a parent and a teenager.