Age gap between siblings

[ljmarsden]

What age gap do you have/ would you like to have between your children?

I have a gentle parenting style with my 12 month old baby (we breastfeed on demand, baby wear and co-sleep etc). I am keen to continue this but I wonder how far my parenting style is viable (as it stands) with two or three young children?

[aussiemidwife]

I had almost 3 years between baby no. 2 and 3. I found this a great gap as my second child was becoming more independent and could understand to some degree about the new baby. I did find the sleeping arrangements tricky. So we made a separate bed in our room for the toddler - so he was close and as we didn't have enough space in our bed (I know a lot of families that get a king sized bed). I tandem breastfed for a while and this eased the transition for our toddler. We did everything gradually so that our toddler could adjust. I can't comment on having three young children as my first child was a lot older (10 years when our second child came along).

[Jessica]

I have four children that are all close in age. There is an age gap of almost two years between my first and second, as well as my second and third. My third and fourth are about a year apart. I did tandem breastfeed my oldest two, and I did co-sleep with each of my children for some length of time. My third was a very sleepy baby, and she was able to transition to her own bed fairly easy. So, when my fourth arrived, things were easier. I still use a baby carrier with both of my younger two, so I just baby wear at different times, depending on which child may need held then. If you do want to have children close in age, it can be challenging at times. Yet, it is also fun to have children close in age, as they grow and become friends and play together. I do know families that have a larger age gap, and they like that the older ones can help out with the baby and that the older children are more independent. I do feel very blessed to have my children, even if it has been challenging to have so many that are close in age. I did find that going from three to four children was quite easy for me, and our youngest fit in the family perfectly. I agree with aussiemidwife that it is good to make changes gradually. I think continuing to breastfeed through my pregnancy and tandem breastfeeding helped make the transition easier on my oldest.

[mom2many]

I have four children they were 22 months apart, 28 months apart, and 16 months apart. As of right now, the oldest is 6 and the youngest is about to turn 1. For me, I think that attachment parenting has worked well for us, in spite of the closeness in age. I also agree with Jessica on the positive aspects of having children who are so close together and with number four being an easy transition.

With that being said, I think it would have been easier with 3-4 years between each child. Breastfeeding, cosleeping, cloth diapering, and all the other facets of natural parenting would be so much simpler with only one "baby" at a time.

Is it possible to follow this type of parenting with them so close together? Yes.

Is having several babies that are so close together kind of fun at times? Yes.

But, if I were planning my family today, knowing what I know now, I'd probably leave a bigger gap for my own sanity.

[Lucky120]

Well my son is 2 and I am having my second son next year in March. They will be about two years apart. I did not want a huge age gap between them at all because I think that they should be close at least. This is why we decided to have them a little close together.

[ljmarsden]

Thank you for your replies on this! Really interested to read about your families.