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  1. #1
    New Member

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    Dec 2012
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    How to prepare myself more?

    Hi,

    I have a traumatic experience with my first delivery. I know I shouldn't make a big deal out of it. But the thing is, I am pregnant with my second child. I am happy, of course. Don't get me wrong. But in the end of the day, I couldn't help wondering whether I will have the same experience all over again.

    I do plan on joining a lamaze class, which I didn't go the first time. So I think it might help me somewhat.
    Any suggestions on what I should do next?

  2. #2
    First, you SHOULD make a big deal out of it. Women need to be heard in order to change the despicable treatment that many receive during birth. Your trauma was real and the grief/depression that you feel in relation to it is valid.

    Now, with that being said, I think that taking a lamaze class or some other sort of childbirth class is extremely helpful. I would also look into hiring a midwife. Are you comfortable with your care provider this pregnancy? Have you discussed your previous experience with them?

    -Angela

  3. #3
    New Member

    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    12
    Hi, Angela.

    Yes, I am quite happy with my current obgyn. He's fine by my standard.
    My problem is with the nurses. They are just so ignorant. I went to the hospital 24 hours prior my labor. And I practically just lied there, enduring painful contraptions. Thank god my mother was there. She yelled to the nurses for ignoring me
    I'll go to another hospital for this one. Hope things went well.

    Thank you for your post. It is really helpful in comforting me.

  4. #4
    I am glad you are happy with your current OB, that is so important. I highly recommend that you wait for labour to begin naturally and stay at home as long as possible. Your own home is far more comfortable than the hospital and you can stay hydrated, eat, take showers, and walk around freely. Even with highly supportive OBs/Midwives, I often recommend that my doula clients who are healthy and capable, remain home as long as possible for their own comfort. Unfortunately nurses are hard to peg, some are fantastic and others not so much. Unlike a doctor or midwife, there is no real way of knowing who your nurse will be. Just remember you can often request another nurse if you feel that a nurse is not meeting your needs or treating you poorly =)

  5. #5
    New Member

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    Dec 2012
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    12
    I think I will do exactly that.

    Thanks for your advice.

  6. #6
    Hi Winda,

    I agree with mom2many that it is your right to have your birth wishes respected. Birthing should be an empowering experience where the woman is respected. Sadly this is not the case for so many women. Like yourself, my first birth was traumatic and I experienced post traumatic stress afterwards.

    However, it doesn't have to be like this again for you. You are doing the right thing to be thinking about how the next birth can be a positive experience. My second birth was just over 8 weeks ago and was a special, happy and highly positive experience. I used hypnobirthing and had a lovely supportive doula: both of these choices helped me to have the birth I wanted.

    You can have the birth you hope for! I would recommend that you find out as much as possible about the different birth choices available and you can have a special, life-affirming birth.

    With best wishes,

    LJ

  7. #7
    New Member

    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    12
    Dear LJ,

    First, congrats on your new baby. Hope you and the baby well.
    And thanks for the advice. I do have a little research on-going - waterbirth holds my interest so far.
    But again, we'll see.

    Merry Christmast!!

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