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Thread: How do you deal with criticism?
29th December 2011 05:35 AM #1
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- Dec 2011
How do you deal with criticism?
I did vaccinate my first child fully, but I delayed vaccinations for my second child and my third child. My youngest has not been vaccinated at all. I have read books on vaccines, but I am constantly looking for more information. I found this book, The Parents Concise Guide to Childhood Vaccinations by Lauren Feder, and I think it looks amazing. I like that the author explains everything fully, and gives you tips for whether you choose to vaccinate or not.
What I am having difficulty with is the increasing amount of criticism and lack of support for my choices. I am still not sure when or if my younger children will receive vaccines, or which ones I will agree too. My paediatrician has been supportive and respects my decisions, but I find that some people in the office are not supportive and feel that my children need to be fully vaccinated.
How do you deal with criticism if you have delayed vaccines or if you have chosen not to vaccinate at all?
Last edited by Jessica; 29th December 2011 at 07:41 AM.
29th December 2011 01:56 PM #2
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- Dec 2011
I have not done this at all, but I have to say that you should not listen to anyone but yourself when it comes to your child. People do that because they have nothing better to do. No one should tell you how to raise your child and when to vaccinate them. Many doctors will actually try and tell you certain issues and down falls of not vaccinating your children, but they are just letting you know in advance. I have ot say other than that don't let no one tell you that you have to vaccinate them, if you do not want to. You are a mother and as a Mother that is your choice.
8th January 2012 01:40 PM #3
When your choice is not "mainstream"
My husband and I have chosen many alternatives to mainstream thinking with raising our children. Alternative medicine, homeschooling, homebirth, naturally increasing fertility vs. medical treatment, not vaccinating and more.
So for me, it has become all about educating myself in each of these areas so that I have full confidence in my decisions. If I think about my children and what is best for them, then it doesn't matter what others think. I need to do what's best for my children - I need to protect them and be their advocate. Knowledge is power.
If someone wants to "discuss" why I've chosen an alternate route, or they want to impart their opinion, I'll share some fabulous success story in an effort to help them see the positives. If they challenge that by saying that they've heard bad things about "whatever it is I'm doing", I'll share that I understand this, but after doing all the research (and I'll share how much I've done), my husband and I feel very strongly that this is the best decision for our family and it's worked well for us. They usually won't come back after that.
Sometimes it helps to realize that they are speaking from ignorance or from a point of emotion if they've seen a bad outcome. Educating youself to the point of feeling fully confident in your decisions is really important and helps you to face those who oppose your choices with a smile on your face and a song in your heart. You're doing what's best for your child and that's what's most important.
Keep up the good work! Your children will appreciate all of the time you put into researching what's best for them.
Last edited by 5Homebirths4Kate; 8th January 2012 at 01:45 PM.
16th January 2012 05:55 AM #4
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
I, similar to you, vaccinated my first completely and then delayed vaccinations with the next three. For me, I have just learned to ignore most of the criticism, though I can't say it is easy. You have to stay steadfast in your beliefs and do what works for your child. Whatever you do, don't let others bully you into making choices that you wouldn't normally make.
19th June 2013 07:35 PM #5
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- Jun 2013
I dont vaccinate my children and i am so over the judgemental critisising people. What happened to human rights and respecting peopless choices and beleifs im doing the best for my children i wish ppl would b more informed and understanfing.
19th June 2013 09:10 PM #6
It's great to read your post - you sound like a wonderful mum who makes decisions led by your children's needs. What a shame that the parenting world can be plagued by the judgments of other parents. Us parents should stand together and share our experience and knowledge rather than criticising the parenting styles of others.
The longer I am a parent for, the more I appreciate how individual and unique each child (and family) is. What is right for one family may not necessarily be right for another. With choosing what vaccinations to have for my children, I have considered the risks of the vaccines (and the likelihood of them contracting the disease) for each child individually. The decisions I make have been affected by where we lived (we have lived in two different countries since having children - there have been different risks of contracting the diseases in question because of the different populations we have lived in) and additional health factors specific to my children.
I look forward to hearing more about your experiences on this forum and hope we can support each other in this parenting adventure. Here on this forum we have the chance to help each other be the best parents we can, rather than look down on each others' choices.