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  1. #1
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    Oct 2013
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    10

    Mind-boggling past experience

    Hi!

    I have this mind-boggling experience I had more than 10 years ago.
    That was when I was 17 and had no idea how things were.

    I had a boyfriend then and we had sexual intercourse the first time. As far as I can remember, it didn't last for a few minutes. I was very scared so I went home, rushed to the bathroom and washed myself very well.

    After less than a week, it happened again. But this time, I bled. We thought it was normal but the bleeding didn't stop. I lost a lot of blood and was rushed to the hospital. My blood pressure was 50/30 when we got there. I remembered I couldn't talk even if I wanted to. I couldn't get up. I was so weak.

    After being in the hospital for a few days, the doctor sent me home. They said I had a miscarriage. I still had some bleeding but it was lighter then.
    But then after a few more days, the bleeding seemed to have worsen and I had to go over pads after pads.

    My parents decided to take me to a different hospital. They did an ultrasound, ran some tests. I ended up needing blood transfusion as the bleeding kept getting worse.

    After a week, the doctor said I was ready to go home.

    When I went back to school, they needed me to get a Medical report or record of some sort to prove that I got sick those days when I missed school.
    The doctor that gave me the paper wrote "complete abortion" on it. I was scared, surprised and still wondering up to this day if I really got pregnant and had a miscarriage. I was even scared I wouldn't be able to get pregnant again if I really had miscarriage. But God has been good to me and gave me 2 wonderful blessings, my 3 year old daughter and 6 month old son.

    My question is: was really possible for me to get pregnant that quick and then lose the baby that easily.. or whether it really happened or not?

  2. #2
    Dear Herasky,

    I'm so sorry to hear about your experience. That must have been extremely scary and it has obviously played on your mind since.

    It is possible to have an early miscarriage at the time after sex that you describe. In rare cases a miscarriage can lead to hemorrhaging which is dangerous for the mother and it sounds like this is what may have happened in your case (as you needed to have a blood transfusion).

    When a doctor says that a miscarriage is 'complete' he means that there is no part of the embryo left in the womb and so no further action is needed to remove any remains of the pregnancy.

    Most women who have a miscarriage do go on to have a healthy pregnancy in the future. I am delighted to read about your two children.

    In conclusion, from what the doctor said at the time and what you describe it does sound like you had an early miscarriage that lead to complications with very heavy (and unusual) bleeding. I'm so sorry that this happened. Even though it happened many years ago, loss and trauma can still have a very real effect on us today. You may find this article useful about remembering our babies when they were lost at a very early stage in pregnancy.

    Please post back how you are feeling and if you have any further questions.

    Thinking of you,
    LJ

  3. #3
    New Member

    Join Date
    Oct 2013
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    10
    Thanks a lot for the reply, LJ. Now I know why it happened. Everything happened so fast and I was in shock that I didn't even know what was really going on. Hopefully, this will make me feel better.

  4. #4
    I really hope that understanding what happened to you does help you to come to terms with the traumatic experience you went through and the loss of a pregnancy that you experienced. No matter what stage of pregnancy someone has a loss it is always a loss and grieving needs to take place. Have you had a chance to read the article I linked to above? I think it will help you to come to terms with what happened.

    I'm so sorry to hear you were not informed properly at the time about what was happening with your body. It shouldn't have been like that.

    Thinking of you,
    LJ

  5. #5
    New Member

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    Oct 2013
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    Just read the article..and wow.. I'm at a loss for words. Thank you so much for sharing it. It means a lot to me.

  6. #6
    Yes it is a deeply moving article isn't it.

    I hope that you are able to come to terms with the loss you experienced many years ago and that you are able to replace the negative, scary trauma of this with positive and special ways to remember your baby who you lost at a very early stage in the pregnancy.

    Please do post back as you process your feelings and let us know if you have any further questions.

    Warm wishes,
    LJ

  7. #7
    New Member

    Join Date
    Oct 2013
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    10
    Thanks again, LJ!
    I'm feeling much better now.

  8. #8
    I'm very pleased to hear that.

    Warm wishes,
    LJ

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