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  1. #1

    Respecting Discipline

    After you try everything you know, what can you suggest be done with an elementary school child who consistently gets kicked off the school bus for fighting and doesn't want to respect authority?

  2. #2
    Dear byfaith,

    I'm sorry to hear about this situation - it sounds very difficult.

    I would want to get to the cause of the fighting; this is more effective in the long run than simply dealing with the inappropriate behaviour. Is there something going on in this child's life which is causing them to act out? Is it possible that they are being bullied on the bus and this is why they are reacting with violence? Are they getting on well at school; do they feel settled and happy?

    Rather than simply reacting to this inappropriate behaviour; if we put a focus on listening to the child and trying to work out why they are acting like this it may help more. Could they explain their feelings and experiences through: chatting, role play, creative arts (such as poetry) or a picture?

    Is this a recent problem or has it been going on for a while?

    If the school bus is the main problem area then it could be this is a particularly difficult environment for the child we are talking about. Would it be possible for them to use another transport means, at least just for a period of time? This would have the benefit of the child knowing they are being valued and removed from a situation where conflict arises. It would also enable you to assess if it really is the school bus environment which is causing the problem or if it is a wider problem.

    It's important to teach our children the skills to enable them to deal with difficult situations. Sharing books with our children about possible difficult situations which may arise can help with this. It gives us an opportunity to talk about how we would deal with our emotions in a conflict situation. Children are natural sponges and they also reflect the way they have seen adults deal with conflict around them. A mentoring scheme can be helpful here where children are discipled by an older, respected adult or older teenager.

    Please post back and let me know your thoughts on this. We can offer some more suggestions after this.

    Best wishes,
    LJ
    Last edited by ljmarsden; 20th April 2014 at 06:13 AM.

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