Robyn had her first baby at home. She had planned a home birth for her second child, but the baby was in the breech position. A lack of support for her desire to have a natural, vaginal birth meant a search for new carers in the last weeks of her pregnancy.
‘I had accepted the seeming inevitability of a hospital birth and felt that with my carers in place I had done everything I could to maximise my chances of a vaginal birth with minimal interference. I had also come to realise that there are elements of birth way beyond anyone's control and at this point it was time for me to let go of trying to control the outcomes. What a powerful learning experience this was for me. In a sense it was like stepping off the edge of a cliff and trusting that there was a power for good working in my life that would carry me through this experience regardless of the outcome.
‘I dimmed my bedroom light and lit a candle and meditated. Afterwards I felt so peaceful. I felt I had come to a place of purity in my mind. I had expelled all the demons. I had taken control of everything that it was within my power to control and then I had let go of all the other stuff, which was totally out of my hands. I felt cleansed and serene. About 30 minutes later my waters broke and an hour and 25 minutes after that I was holding Holly in my arms.
“I've heard it said that our children are our greatest teachers. Never has this been truer than in my birthing experiences. I learnt so much about myself in this process. I am left personally richer and stronger for having surrendered to this experience. I didn't give in, but recognised what was beyond my control and then trusted in a higher process - a powerful force within this universe beyond my own control or that of the institutional management of birth. I took a leap of faith and the rewards were immeasurable - the perfect birth experiences and two perfect, beautiful little girls. I am left feeling so fulfilled by my experiences that now, in my parenting, when challenges arise as they surely do, I can take control of the situation to the best of my abilities, and beyond that I can hand the situation over, say a prayer or ask for guidance and I know that it will all be okay.’
P.S. Holly came so quickly, she was born naturally, at home.
To find out more about Pinky and her book 'Parenting By Heart' visit Pinky's website